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SIPEDO and YOU

by sipedo from Brooksville, Florida

Last Post 6 days, 10 hours Ago


Last week, a young man named Jordan succumbed to a rare form of soft tissue sarcoma.  He was to be twenty one years old yesterday.  Jordan fought hard.  This young man loved basketball, where he played on a college team near Greenville, SC.  He was a member of a youth group at a church where I was once the youth director.  His family prayed hard, hoping for a miracle, but the miracle they wanted never happened.  They had a celebration of life service for him this past Saturday.

This past Saturday, another man named Jim succumbed at the age of 63 to a 15 month battle with another form of Cancer.  He played guitar at the church where I am currently the music director.  Weak from the disease, he played the guitar for the last time on August 17 with our church band.  Always dedicated, and up until he passed was waiting for that last minute miracle, always expressing his faith in God.

Today, I sit at my computer, not knowing what will be next for me.  I have my own health issues that cause extreme pain, and are preventing me from working full time.  This is a burden physically, and financially. I am hoping God will work wonders for me, but to date, nothing has happened, and my diagnosis still remains the same.  I hope and I pray that "miracle" will come, but nothing so far.

All three of us, Jordan, Jim and Myself have kept faith.  Two of us have succumbed.  I have not been so fortunate.

There are days when I just want to give up.  There are days when I give God the ultimatum to either heal me or take me.  He does neither. So much for giving God ultimatums.

There are days when I want to curse God.  There I days when I want to send Jesus back to the cross and re-crucify him.  Why isn't God answering the prayers of His people and healing those who follow hard after Him?

In all of this, I still cannot reverse my faith.  I know that I have to trust God.  I know that circumstances will come that will make me strong.  I know that I am a very small part of a very big picture.  Many will affect the lives of a few, and a few will affect the lives of many.  Which one am I?

What would you do?  Some of you are in similar circumstances, or know someone who is.  What keeps YOU going?  What keeps THEM going?  How do YOU and THEY keep the faith from going in reverse?

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Member Comments Total Comments: 13
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NeZe read my blog view my photos
Aug 26, 2008 | 11:33 AM

Hey, Sipedo,

So sorry to hear about the passing of Jordan and Jim. It sounds like they were faithful souls, just like you are.

I have to tell you, I admire your strength and conviction when you say: "I know I have to trust God". I believe that your answer is there.

My best friend was diagnosed with bone cancer in January. This came as a surprise after she fell and broke her leg. Thereafter, she found out that the cancer was not only in her bones, but in different parts of her body. It was devastating news, but she is a fighter and I love her for that.

I have been praying for her, but at the same time, I know God has her in the palm of His Hand and is taking care of her. I'm sure God is doing the same with you.

I know a lot of times I feel 'rebellious' about my faith, but then something happens that shows me who is in control.

Please keep on being strong and don't let your faith fall.

My prayers are with you ... God Bless,

didaskalos read my blog
Aug 26, 2008 | 9:21 PM

Sip, I am so sorry brother. Thanks for sharing honestly about your pain and faith struggles ... and for your perseverence in that faith in spite of your pain.

I am healthy (for the moment) and still I long to leave this world to be with the Lord. My father, 84 and a Christ-follower, recently had a brush with death. His joyful perspective was that death is the ultimate deliverance(healing) and if he was still here on this earth, he still had a job to glorify God any way he could.

I don't have any answers Sip, but I appreicate your desire to impact many. May it be so. Blessings and I prayed for you.

Goofy1966 read my blog
Aug 28, 2008 | 7:40 AM

First, may God be with the families of the two men that passed away. Their families are the ones suffering now, they are blissfully pain free and enjoying the riches of heaven.

Second, I can sympathize with you. I too am in pain every single day of my life. I have diabetes and have neuropathy as a result. There is not a day that goes by that my legs and feet don't hurt. I have many other heatlh issues as well and had to leave work almost 2 years ago, but according to disability lawyers, I am not disabled enough, even though I cannot sit or stand for extended periods of time. But anyway, it is hard to keep the faith and to keep believing for that miracle, but what else can we do? The alternative is that there's nothing else out there, no one above looking out for us, no eternal life when we do leave this life. Be strong and keep the faith!! It's good to know that I am not alone out there!!

northton read my blog view my photos
Aug 29, 2008 | 7:33 AM

Ouch!

northton read my blog view my photos
Aug 29, 2008 | 7:36 AM

Hey I'm just being honest. If it's as bad as you are making out, then you have the power to end it. Me thinks you're not ready to go.

mdmiller view my photos
Aug 31, 2008 | 12:16 PM

When sorrowed times come my way.
Be it as it may,
My path can be unclear to see,
but god has a plan for me,
When times seem bleak, with emptiness,
I'll not retreat, for i am blessed,

Some thinks we're yet not meant to know,
Like when the time for letting go,
For he will catch me this I trust,
That god has a plan for all of us.

northton read my blog view my photos
Sep 1, 2008 | 1:16 PM

He has some pretty nasty plans. Wake up Dozer, some people will live a decent life and some will go through hell. It ain't planned it just happens..

northton read my blog view my photos
Sep 1, 2008 | 1:18 PM

Go to a burn unit and tell me what kind of plan that was. Go to a country stricken by famine and tell me what kind of plan that was.
Go see genocide and tell me what kind of plan that was.

Use some sense.

DeborahLakeHelen read my blog view my photos
Sep 1, 2008 | 6:21 PM

Sip, My Brother, consider this: Maybe your Father has decided it is time for your suffering to end, and for you to be rewarded with your crowns. You know, Sip, what God has said about our trials. All things will work out for the good for those who love HIM. I am so sorry you are suffering. Right now, as I type this to you, Hospice has been called in to sit with the Mother of my Son-in Law. Tomorrow, I'll sit in as her caregiver, for awhile. She doesn't know The LORD like you do,
and I'm praying that The Holy Spirit will fill my mouth with the right words to say to her. She has but a few days, maybe weeks at the most. You'll be in my prayers, Bro. ABBA loves you more than anything, don't you ever forget, or lose sight of that! He'll never, ever let go of you! God Bless!

sipedo read my blog view my photos
Sep 1, 2008 | 6:32 PM

Northton, I know you are trying to be honest, but what you really need is some sensitivity training.

Deb, Death is not something I am afraid of, and it is not in the near future for me, as far as I know anyway. I will pray for you as you speak words of life to your son in laws mother.

DeborahLakeHelen read my blog view my photos
Sep 1, 2008 | 7:03 PM

Thank you, Sip! I'm glad you're going to be around for awhile, too! I'm sorry you're suffering, though! I'll pray for you to have comfort, relief and healing. Love Ya!
Northton, take a hike. Sometimes you're just not funny. This is one of those times and one of those situations where nobody appreciates sadistic humor.

mdmiller view my photos
Sep 1, 2008 | 9:49 PM

Wow. Northton it seems like you have really mastered the power of posotive giving up!

northton read my blog view my photos
Sep 1, 2008 | 11:57 PM

Perhaps you are right Sipi. Where so I send the flowers?

Deb, I hate hiking and I wasn't trying to be funny.

And no, miller, I don't like giving up.

I have heard the phrase, "sometimes I wish the lord would take me away" and similar statements. I have seen people suffer and I think there is a limit to how much pain a person should have to live with. They feel it's morally wrong to "give up". They want god to do it. I think it's okay to go rather than suffer if things are really that bad.

My question to Sipi is, "Is it really that bad?". If not then maybe you should hang around for a while.

But if it's really that bad, if your quality of life is really poor, then don't feel guilty about giving up. It's not a decision to be taken lightly but I feel we should each have the right to choose how long we want to endure.

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sipedo

Hi, I'm a musician, I live in a house and I have 3 dogs. I believe in God and Jesus, and am the most imperfect person in the world. The hand I have been dealt is better than most, but not as good as others. I am blessed to be alive, and looking forward to the day when this body will be replaced.

Member Since: 10/4/2006